(Scene: a normal, boring Thursday morning, and our two favorite working girls are weighing the options for their futures. Since becoming independently wealthy seems to be evading their grasp, L comes up with the next best idea…reality television and wine. There’s no way they won’t be successful …right?)
L: I figured out what we can do with our lives, since the whole having people give us money for no apparent reason isn’t working out.
K: Oh yeah? I’m excited to hear this idea!
L: We can be WINOS! Together!
K: YES! Wait, why? I mean, I’m not against it whatsoever, I’m just curious to where this idea came from.
L: Well, I’ve never enjoyed wine of any kind, but recently was turned on to this white wine called Muscato. It’s so good, I’m fairly certain I could drink a whole bottle (ok, not really, but it is that good), and the best part is that you don’t get a headache or feel crappy the next day. We’ll be such classy girls, what with our wine and maybe even some cheese!
K: WAIT. I JUST HAD AN IDEA.
L: WHAT?
K: We need to start our own wino reality tv show.
L: No. Way.
K: Ok, picture this: you and me, living under a bridge, specifically the one at 31st and Sheridan. We’ll have a pet squirrel and pigeon and we can teach them to do little tricks. We can even have a shopping cart that we share!!
L: We should start out small on YouTube, get someone to fund us, and then go from there. Maybe we could even get a book deal.
K: OUR OWN BRAND OF WINE! IN TINY BOXES!
L: We’re going to be rich! RICH, FAMOUS WINOS.
K: We have the best ideas. Sigh.
(Pause…Pause…Pause)
L: Let’s revisit this idea of tiny boxes of wine….
K: Oh, yeah! Like, boxes of fruit juice, except with wine. It would even come with a little straw. You know, for people on the go!
L: That’s a great idea!
K: Or even wine in a Capri Sun pouch. It’s fun, yet classy.
L: We’re geniuses.
K: True that.
(End Scene)
Our Father's Mustache 