(Scene: A rainy Thursday at the office. Both girls have been caught up in the phenomenon known as “The Hunger Games” and are discussing their survival tactics. So far all they’ve realized is that they would die pretty quickly unless they develop some mad crazy wilderness skills.)
K: I just realized that I can barely open a string cheese without some kind of struggle. There’s not a chance in hell I would survive the hunger games.
L: Hahaha! I decided to walk the staircase during my lunch breaks. 3 floors into it I wanted to die; that’s when I had the EXACT same realization that you just came to. We are pathetic. Have you finished reading the first one? I was about to give out some tactics we could use but didn’t want to spoil anything…
K: Finished the first and am well into the second. Anyway, I want to hear your tactics!
L: Ok, so I’m thinking we’d have to try to either be like Foxface (what an awful nickname) or Rue. We’d need to survive by staying hidden. Also, the berries that killed Foxface; we could find those berries (assuming we had the knowledge that they were poisonous) and find ways to get the other contenders to eat them. I don’t know how exactly we’d pull that off. But, I feel like being sneaky creepers is one skill we have. So we’d have to hone in on that.
K: We are so good at being sneaky creepers! And we’re also good at anger, so maybe we could use that to our advantage. The rage might be a superpower. WE COULD BAKE CUPCAKES WITH THE BERRRIES! OMG! And Chuck could teach us how to throw a disc in a way that it causes serious injury. Whatever happens, we have an alliance that cannot be broken. Not even by a creepy president that has bloody breath.
L: Ew, isn’t the bloody scent thing gross? We would operate as one unit and if anyone killed one of us, they’d have to kill the other. Hahaha I don’t think we can bake in the wilderness, but I’m sure you’ve thought of that. Rage: a definite plus. So, the cave scene; Did you love it? Sigh, I keep listening to “Safe and Sound” by Taylor Swift ft. The Civil Wars and I become captain of Team Peeta. I think they’ll play that song during the cave scene.
K: I got so mad at Haymitch for not sending something to Peeta to help heal his leg. I know that it was a tactic, but still. Poor Peeta! Also, Peeta in my head is WAY better looking than movie Peeta. And I did love the cave scene…so romantic! Of course, I’ve always daydreamed of some kind of survival situation being how I fall in love…this is just reinforcing that daydream. So did you buy the soundtrack or are you just listening to it online?
L: I think the soundtrack is only available for pre-sale right now… I can’t remember though it might be on sale now. But there were like two songs that you could preview, “Safe and Sound” being one of them. I just looked it up on YouTube. Yes, movie Peeta is SO disappointing! I was so mad when I saw who would play him. HE’S SO SHORT AND YOUNG AND THAT IS NOT WHAT PEETA IS SUPPOSED TO LOOK LIKE. Sigh.
K: OMFG. http://www.spiffingjewelry.com/category_s/1984.htm
L: KATIE! STOP GOOGLING HUNGER GAMES STUFF! I say this out of love. You’re going to spoil things for yourself! Some of those phrases are from Mockingjay! CLOSE THE WINDOW NOW!
K: I CAN’T HELP IT! DAMN PINTEREST!!!! ARGGHHHH! WINDOW CLOSED! Haha, I love you. You crack me up.
L: Bahahaha, Damn Pinterest, indeed!!! Ohhh we are quite the pair, ya know that?
K: I know, but I can’t think of a better set of besties no matter how hard I try.
(This intense “Bestie Love” as they call it is the type of loyalty that provides strength and dangerous amounts of rage when one or the other has been hurt. They will defend each other to the death, which could prove to be more useful than knife skills. Probably not, but it makes them feel better. End scene)
Our Father's Mustache 