Our Father's Mustache

(Scene: a conversation between two 90’s kids; any time is a good time to drop a kung-fu reference)

MR: I tried to look something up today but my google-fu is way off.

K: (dissolving into maniacle giggles) your “google-fu” was off?

MR: Why is that funny?

K: (still giggling hysterically)

MR: Really? You’re really laughing this hard over—

K: GOOGLE-FU!!!!!

MR: I didn’t realize it was that funny.

K: It is. It’s the new “Unagi.”

MR: Seriously?

K: (still giggling, whispers…) google-on, google-off; google-fu.

(End scene)

(Confession: these really are the things I vocalize to Lo. I’m so glad she puts up with my quirky tendancies)

K: If overalls become “ironic,” I’m going to cry. I just can’t handle that at this moment in my life (this is the kind of drama that dominates my life. Not lovers or ex-boyfriends, just the fear of overalls becoming ironic. I think I might be deranged).

L: Haha! There is a good chance.  Just kidding. I love you.

(End Scene)

(Scene: Work. Commence Hanson Fan club emails.)

L: HOLY FREAKING CRAP WHY ARE WE NOT RICH!?@!?!?!?!?!  A guaranteed amazing trip to the Bahamas with HANSON?!?!?!!? Siiiiiiiiiighhhhhhhhhhhhhh.  I’m guessing it’ll be like $4,000.  OMG AND SINCE WE LIVE IN TULSA WE MIGHT EVEN BE ON THE SAME PLANE AS THEM! Or do they take private jets?

K: OMFG! WE have one year to sell our plasma and start selling our brains to laureate for those studies. I think we could raise the money if we really tried!!! WHAT IF THEY GIVE A TRIP AWAY?!?!?!?

WE HAVE TO BE THERE.

L: Well, it goes on sale tomorrow so we can see how much it is.  That will tell us whether or not this is even a possibility! “Hey Chuck, for our Five Year Anni, will you send me to Jamaica so I can hang out with Taylor Hanson on the beach??”  Yeah, don’t think that’s gonna fly, hahaha!

OMG TAYLOR IN SWIM TRUNKS.

OMFG This means we need to find a copy of P-90X STAT to start getting in shape! Crap, I suddenly feel so pressured! If they give a trip away, and one of us wins, I think the winner would be obligated to pay ½ the cost to get the other of us there…. Yes?!?

K: Absolutely. If one person wins, the other pays for ½ the trip. Because honestly, the trip would suck if we weren’t there to giggle like maniacs together.

Taylor. Swim trunks.  My brain just melted a little bit. A lot, actually.

P90x, so not only will we look smoking, but we’d have a shot in a hunger games situation. OMG, IT WOULD BE LIKE THE HUNGER GAMES WITH ALL THOSE CRAZY FANS. Add archery lessons to our list of ways to prepare for Jamaica (any excuse to learn how to…arch…?).

L: Bahaha, everything about that email was perfect. You are SO right. It would be our very own version of the Hunger Games!  The Hanson Games!  Oh, and I had to take Archery in P.E. Class in middle school, I was AWFUL and hurt myself, haha.

K: WE SHOULD GET NERF “BOW & ARROWS” AND HAVE OUR OWN HUNGER GAMES PARTY!!!!!

L: Haha, surely we can’t hurt ourselves that way, can we?!

K: We should offer to be official Hanson bodyguards, should that conversation ever arise at the members only event. I’m trying to imagine that conversation and keep giggle-snorting.

L: LOL yeah I think that conversation would end before it really got started :-P 

(An actual email chain between the two best friends. End scene.)

Hunger Games comes out at midnight THIS THURSDAY! OMG! WTF! SO HAPPY! ARBITRARY LETTERS! ASFIAHTHROIHFNAUJGBI!

The only thing better than reading the books (besides seeing the movie), is watching trailers for the movie. Or at least that’s what I thought until I saw this youtube video posted by hungergamesguys:

I’ve watched it 3 times in the last 20 minutes. So far the best fan tribute (HA! GET IT??? Fan TRIBUTE???).

So while you wait with eager and unbridaled anticipation for the movie to be released, watch this video.

(Scene: Outside of the boss’ office, freezing. Both D and K have their heaters running at full blast…)

CB: (speaking to D) Are you COLD? Good Grief.

D: Yes, it’s COLD! K, are you cold?

K: Yes, I have my heater on and it smells like bacon.

(Pause……)

CB: Why does it smell like bacon?

K: I don’t know…but this is usually when I turn my heater off.

CB: When you smell bacon?

K: Or just breakfast meats of any kind.

CB: Okay (Goes back into his office).

(Just another normal day at the office; End scene.)